I’m not dead. I’m just busy working extra shifts for the jyuku. That’s why I haven’t written any posts lately. Also, there’s been a severe lack of stuff to write about.

So last Wednesday, after I finished my ALT (assistant language teacher) job I went surfing for the first time in almost 2 weeks.

When I got to the beach at about 2:30pm, there were only about 20 other surfers in the water. Feeling drained from just finishing work, I slowly slid into my wet suit, huffed my board against my side, and walked down to the water. The temperature was the hottest I’ve endured at the beach this year so far, about 78°F and the sun was shining brightly. By the time I crossed the beach and made it to the water, I was uncomfortably sweltering in my thick black wet suit, but I still took the time to stretch before paddling out.

I paddled out through the channel and joined the line up. The waves were just below head so they pounded me a little when I wiped out, but they weren’t the worst I’ve endured since I began a couple months ago.

Usually, all I do is wipe out, spending little time actually standing on the board. Usually I’m too excited and, honestly, a little freaked out, every time I start to catch a wave that I tense up too much, preventing me from really feeling the motion of the wave, and I wipe out. But today was different. Maybe it was the result of work fatigue, but I felt really care-free, relaxed. So after a couple initial poundings, I, for the first time, successfully rode a wave from start to finish without wiping out. It was surreal. The only comparison that will do it justice is learning to ride a bike. At first, you fall a lot, scraping your knees and elbows, but after a while something in your brain just clicks and viola, you can ride a bike.

Of course, simply learning how to ride a bike is much different from professional BMX racers, or mountain biking, and the occasional wipe-outs are inevitable. I’m feeling the same way about surfing right now, I still can’t turn on the wave very well, but I can ride waves making for a much more enjoyable experience.

I’m going back tomorrow with a new rashie (shirt to protect from friction rashes while paddling) and swimming trunks. The water’s finally warm enough not to need a wet suit! This means that no one has an excuse to stay at home anymore. So get your asses over here and come to the beach with me sometime. I’ll even lend my stick to anyone who wants to try surfing.

On a side note, I recently found out that the area I always surf at is world-renowned for its surfing. There is going to be a pro surf competition held there in the next month, and has Japanese surf-celebrity patrons including my favorite Japanese actor, “Kimu Taku.”

I figure it’s better to post about something instead of continuing this dry spell of posts, so I have taken on the “100 Things Challenge,” and reduced my possessions to just 100 things (well, close to it anyways).

There are three immediately recognizable benefits of doing so:

1. It’s like spring cleaning. Less stuff = more room to breathe.

2. Moving is easier. Next time, I’ll only make two trips, rather than twenty-four.

3. When I return to the States next year, everything I own will easily fit into two suitcases.

Exclusions

I have excluded a few things from the list of 100.

Clothes
I have excluded clothes for three reasons. First, I barely own any. Second, I really need to buy new ones. Third, to reduce the size of my wardrobe (namely socks and underwear) is unrealistically gross and every once in awhile I like to have a g/f.

Food
I have excluded food and cooking ingredients from the list.

Treasure
Loot. Booty. Plunder. Spoils of war. Call it what you will, “treasure” is anything special I’ve collected here in Japan. It would be wrong to dispose of such things, so instead I’ve designated an empty box as a treasure chest. Once full, I’ll mail it to my parents’ home so that one day I’ll have something to show my grandkids.

Initially I thought 100 was not very many things; from my bed nearly 160 items are visible, and if one were to include all other belongings in the room, the amount more than doubles. After considerably consolidating, drastically disposing, and all manner of alliteration later, I have reduced the number of things I own to the following list.

The List

1. Mini Garbage Bin — apartment
2. Ear Plugs
3. Box of Q-tips
4. Cell Phone
5. Keys + Keychain
6. Wallet
7. Glasses
8. Mini-Mirror (in Hojo)
9. Coin Purse
10. Deodorant
11. Moisturizing Cream
12. Replacement Shaving Blades (2)
12. Aftershave
13. Cell Phone Recharger
14. DS
15. Notepad
16. Bracelets
17. Agrias USB Cord
18. Swiss Army Knife
19. Juggling Balls
20. Nail Clippers
21. Headphone Jack
22. CD/DVDs, 3 Cases
23. Book: The Tao of Pooh — from Nick, return
24. Book: How to Juggle
25. Book: Japanese 1
26. Book: Japanese 2
27. Book: Japanese 3
28. Agrias Battery Recharger
29. Cologne Vials
30. Book: Tokyo Tourist
31. Keyboard Power Adapter
32. Metal Box — looking to give away
33. Metal Cigarette Case
34. Slippers (2) — apartment
35. Shoes
36. Lint Cleaner
37. Penguin Bookmark
38. Mechanical Pencil Lead
39. Mechanical Pencils (2)
40. Pen (1)
41. MTG Deck
42. Running Shoes
43. Quilt
44. Blanket
45. Sheets (3)
46. Umbrella (2)
47. Rain Coat Plastic
48. Fuzzy Teddy Bear — looking to give away
49. Dante
50. Dante’s Power Cord
51. Power Splitter — apartment
52. Dante’s Mouse
53. Dante’s Case
54. Dante’s Mouse Pad
55. Broken MIDI Controller — need to throw away
56. Keyboard
57. Hojo
58. Hand Towel
59. Kaito
60. Tokyo Folded Map
61. Agrias
62. USB Drive
63. MP3 Player
64. Headphones
65. Chapstick
66. Gloves
67. Ethernet Cord
68. Big Red Towel — looking to get rid of
69. Hanging Clips — apartment
70. Hanging Dowels + Shelf — apartment
71. Compass
72. First-Aid Kit
73. Bento Box
74. Shaving Cream (1st)
75. Jae’s Glass
76. Green Dot Mug
77. Drink Coaster
78. Furoshiki
79. Book: JSL
80. Suction Cups — apartment
81. Electrical Stuff Bag — many things inside
82. Suction Cup Towel Hanger — apartment
83. Small Shower Towel
84. String Floss
85. Toothbrush
86. Face Cream
87. Toothpaste
88. Toothbrush/paste holder — apartment
89. Laundry Basket
90. Rice Cooker — apartment
91. Laundry Detergent (box + bottle)
92. Hangers
93. Big Suitcase
94. Small Suitcase
85. Book Bag
86. Giant White Towel — looking to get rid of
87. [Censored]
88. Sewing Kit
89. Book: Murakami
90. [Censored]
91. Q-Tips, small box
92. Dante TV Cord
93. Roll of 1JPY Coins — use
94. Deck of Cards
95. Tripod
96. Hanko Kit
97. Agrias Lens Cap Thing
98. Locks (2)
99. Paper Tray — apartment
100. Webcam
101. Eyeglass Repair Kit
102. [Censored]
103. Cologne Bottle
104. Soap + Case
105. Wash Cloth
106. Shampoo
107. Soap (Bottle)
108. Shaving Cream (2nd)
109. Shower Basket
110. Hair Brush
111. Shower Mirror
112. Shaving Razor
113. Tea Strainer
114. Spray Bottle — looking to give away
115. Book: 1
116. Book: 2
117. Book: 3
118. Book: JPN Phrases

118 things. An item designated as “apartment” is currently of practical value, but I’d leave it upon moving or returning to the States as it is not personally meaningful. So excluding “apartment” things (10), things I must return (2), things I’ll give away (2), things I’ll soon use (2), and things I’ll throw away (4), I’ve eliminated my possessions to just 98 items.

Conclusion

In total, this took about an hour. Parting with most items felt good, as in, “ah, finally I’m getting ride of this thing…” while other things took a bit of consideration. Human beings have a psychological disposition to be pack rats; acquiring and hoarding the most useless of stuff in the very unlikely event we may actually need it someday. Over time, these items become representative of our former selves, so to throw them away is to throw away a part of oneself. Not to be all psychological about it or anything.

As a final benefit, having this list helps improve things not by buying more superficial crap, but by improving the practical things one actually uses and “needs.” In this respect, more attention is naturally directed towards valuing one’s current possessions, and you can write long blog posts complete with a very long list of items that no one will read. But hey, at least I posted something.

_peace.

Congratulations are in order for our friends Dan and Catherine for finally tying the knot.

We’ve known Dan since high school. He entered the Inner Circle after correctly answering a laser tag pop quiz by Gerbs:

Gerbs: “If someone is shooting at you and you’re taking heavy fire… what do you do?”
Dan: “Uh… take cover?”
Gerbs: “All right, you’re in. Next Friday at 6.”

We’ve had all sorts of good times since then. Defending Tammy’s house with paintball guns. Winter laser-tag battles. Killing zombies while girls cry. Toilet cleaner bombs. WoW. Building a bridge. Anything that involved alcohol. Old-school video games. Shooting Alex Mansfield. Shooting Alex Mansfield’s fat friend. Trailblazing. Laverne. Dagorhir fights. Uncountable college adventures. Zombie hunting. Back-ups with a good “woo~.” Free movies. Beating Hunter. Twice. Fort building. Shooting each other.

Especially shooting each other.

Yet Dan took a lot of shit from us for being whipped being so committed while still in college. Nick especially remembers the St. Patty’s Day and dual birthday parties in their later years when Dan spent almost two whole days preparing a birthday cake for Catherine. It was shaped like a panda; her favorite animal (an aggressive, lethal killing machine known for the ease at which it can devour human flesh). The cake was iced with intricate, pointy dabs of frosting, but rather than just slathering it all on, Dan took two days to create perfect tiny dots to look more like the texture of panda fur. Then Gerbs derived ultimate pleasure from slicing it’s head open with the cutting knife as Catherine looked on… but the important part is that from the ridiculous amount of effort that Dan put into that cake, we knew he was in for the long haul.

Fortunately, he picked a decent woman. We’ve known Catherine since she began dating Dan… which was in college sometime. We have no idea when that was, but it was in college. Catherine has always looked out for our best interests, sacrificing things for the benefit of others. Sometimes she feels like our mothers, but we know she only has our best interests in mind. For this consideration of others, we give her the stamp of approval for marrying Dan, knowing that she’ll take good care of him in the years to come. Maybe even send him to Japan again.

With that, we were honored to have been invited to the day of your wedding. May your first child be a masculine child.

-Gerbs
-Nick

P.S. - Gaaay…

This time of year in Japan is called 梅雨 (つゆ · tsuyu), or “rainy season.” So far it’s been nothing more than sporadic chains of rain lasting just a couple days, despite having been built into something considerably more significant by practically every Japanese person ever.

So regardless of knowing full well that any amount of walking in the rain reduces either pair of my shoes to heavy sacks of slush, I went to the nearby Meiji Shrine Inner Garden to see its purportedly beautiful irises that are currently in bloom.

Emperor Meiji was the emperor of Japan during the Meiji Restoration, the short period of Japanese history when Japan transformed itself into an isolated back-water chain of islands to a fully industrialized nation. The emperor’s wife (Empress Shōken) had a thing for irises, so he built a garden with irises to impress her.

After their deaths, the area surrounding the garden was converted into a major Shinto shrine dedicated to the emperor. Today, the garden has nearly 1,500 iris plants of over 150 different species. For ￥500, you can roam freely around with old people, which is every bit of exciting as you can imagine such a thing to be.

Each iris plant is individually cared and accounted for. There are no plastics or metals used here. The worker cuts bamboo shoots to a unique length to suit its recipient plant, then ties it to the stem with a piece of greenery. If left unattended, the plants would soon return to their natural state, leaving no traces of human activity. Sure, the thing probably falls apart after a day, but there’s still something to be learned here.

When the shrine was being built, thousands of evergreen trees were donated from all over the country, each area wanting to contribute. Nowadays, Meiji Shrine offers a thick forest getaway in central Tokyo that is practically my backyard. I’ve visited the area half a dozen times since I moved to Tokyo, and yet it still amazes me that such a place is just a short walk from skyscrapers and concrete.

Following the flowers, consecutive failed attempts at a money withdrawal from a series of ATMs proved that I would have to survive the weekend on whatever money I happened to have in my wallet.

In summary of how that went, I am sick of instant noodles.

I did however have tens of thousands of yen on my train pass, so with riding trains the only thing I could actually do, I used it as an opportunity to ride a brand new subway line that just recently opened last week. You know you’ve been in Japan too long when this sort of thing is exciting.

Perhaps the most striking feature of the above picture is its lack of people. The one individual in the distance is actually a station attendant. The train line is on the left, with automatic sliding doors separating them from the platform so it’s more difficult for people to kill themselves. Aside from the lack of people, this is a typical Tokyo subway station.

The new line is built so far underground that, at least at the three separate stations I was at, it takes five minutes of escalator riding to actually reach the platform, and again another five at your destination to reach the light of day.

This was my breakfast companion. I typically eat breakfast every morning in Yoyogi Park where this picture was taken, but never with a crow. This one is relatively small, but crows here are every conceivable meaning of the word “enormous.” I tried to set things in front of him for a size comparison, but he kept pushing it off the wall to spite me. Kaito would have been next, but I figured that’d end badly.

_peace.

Last week I had two roommates: nice guy and idiot guy.

Nice guy would eat rice, drink tea, and generally be eerily quiet and fantastically nice when engaged in conversation. Idiot guy would simply snore so loud the walls would shake. Also noteworthy was his insistence on talking extremely fast; ensuring I’d be unable to hold any meaningful conversation with him, despite my continuous requests for him to do otherwise.

Last Wednesday night at 2am, idiot guy came into the room loudly talking on his cellphone. After a few minutes, nice guy got out of his bed and for no less than five consecutive minutes, berated idiot guy for obvious reasons. Idiot guy was talking with his mother, but nice guy did not seem to care much, as he apparently had to work the following morning and it made no difference who idiot guy was talking with.

Friday night, not long after idiot guy’s reception of an unusually harsh verbal beating for being loud, idiot guy brought a Japanese girl—known for being loud—into the room. For three hours he attempted to “show her a good time.” Whether it was idiot guy’s complete lack of skill whatsoever or the fact his bed was filled with trash or the fact the girl was clearly uncomfortable at the prospect of “being shown a good time” four feet from two complete strangers in a room the size of a closet, she was decidedly not shown a good time. Clearly not one to recognize—much less acknowledge—the discomfort of others, idiot dude attempted to cover whatever noise the poor girl actually did happen to make with loud, continuous snoring.

By the following night, idiot guy was no longer our roommate, having been kicked out by the rental agency, thanks in no small part to nice guy.

He was replaced by an individual who will henceforth by referred to as “smelly dude,” as I know him only by his horrendous smell emanating from his empty bed.

It should be noted that I have earplugs (as does nice guy), so I hear absolutely nothing, and sleep soundly every night. None of these events affect me in any way, and I present them under the assumption they are amusing.

This just in: nice guy, who sustains himself solely on a diet of rice and tea, has moved his rice cooker and hot water boiler to his bed. He has successfully eliminated yet another reason to leave his computer.

On a different note, there’s about half a dozen normal, halfway interesting people living here. By chance I found them drinking wine and eating snacks last night in Yoyogi Park and subsequently spent the evening drinking wine and eating snacks. In addition to them, there is a “man-woman” whose gender is disturbingly ambiguous, a German dude (who speaks English) on some sort of tourist visa allowing him to freely roam the country for a year, and a cute girl to whom I’ve introduced myself three times because she can never seem to remember me.

_peace.